Pineapple head on pineapple dress. Pineapple infinity.
Curls get the girls.
And the guys, the creepos, the oldies, the weirdos, the hipsters, the yuppies, the fucking postmen…
Basically, curls get every person that has never learned the meaning of personal space and social decency.
Don’t fucking pat me if you don’t know me.
5.30am. Venus between my toes. Things are going to be good today.
Getting old used to scare me.
But now I can’t wait to get all saggy and wrinkly and rock purple hair and a fluoro bikini at the beach like a badass Glamour Nanna. To talk fluent potty mouth and confuse young people with my awesome.
That’s really something to look forward to.
Just woke up with some extra glamorous hair. I don’t know how I wasn’t born a Kardashian sometimes.
Things are really difficult inside my head right now. The hardest part of the recovery process is having to open up and re-live chapters that were long closed. I made the decision to try and talk about and deal with as many things as possible hoping that would make the time frame shorter, and now I’m totally fried.
I used to wonder why I ended up in such a poor mental state, but now that I’m forced to go back and relive everything that’s happened in my life I’m actually wondering how I made it this far at all. It’s a bit of a double-edged sword, I’m so broken and struggling to deal with it all but on the other side I’m really quite proud of myself. I don’t like to compare suffering but I know people that have had a much better time growing up and lead a much more destructive adult life. I’m definitely a basket case but I am a good person that tries to be a great person too.
The next few weeks are going to be intense, I have to confront a lot of issues and people and I’m really scared. I’m hopeful too, I know that once I get it over and done with I’ll have answers and relief from things I’ve been pretending to be okay with since I was a child. It’s just all a bit much. Mum already thinks I’m attacking her when I ask her questions or for advice. It’s a big old mess but I’m glad I’m cleaning it up.
Bowie, help me get through this.